You probably first met a FUPA when you had a substitute teacher with pants pulled up so high that the zipper was right under her boobs. Well the FUPA was that lump or pouch that sat comfortably right under that zipper and right above her vag. The FUPA often looks best on middle aged women with short haircuts and penny loafers (who tend to be substitute teachers).
FUPA is an acronym for Fat Upper Pussy Area. Contrary to popular belief, the FUPA is not a roll of fat hanging over the vaginal area. Rather, it is the area directly above the vaginal area which has become enlarged to the point where I want to vomit. Anyone living in Philadelphia has witnesses at least five FUPAs per day since they have moved here...as they are an ever present problem due to huge amount of ginormous, hippopotamus shaped women in this city. 4 in 5 people have reported working with a FUPA at some point in their lives.
The FUPA has strange effects on its victims. Primarily, those that suffer from FUPA are completely oblivious to its presence. Furthermore, the FUPA has the strange ability to cause its host to wear their jeans up near the belly button, which further accents its glory. (Some scientists have come to believe that the FUPA has a rudimentary intelligence). Another trait of FUPA oblivion is when women with FUPAs wear tights, which accentuates the FUPA, provides little support, and makes it look like they stuffed their pants with jello which is now hanging below their stank ass vagina.
Other names for the FUPA include the GUPA- Giant Upper Pussy Area, HUPA- Huge Upper Pussy Area, and lastly CHALUPA- Can't Have A Larger Upper Pussy Area. There are no specific weight classes identified yet.
Why am I writing all of this? Oh yeah, because FUPAs, you have gots to go. I don't wanna look at you anymore and I don't want you jiggling in my face on the bus anymore. Get out. Leave. You have gots to go.
